I've come to the conclusion that people get hurt more easily than they should because they expect too damn much from other humans. Dude, give us a break, we're all fucked up in some way. If he doesn't call the next day, it doesn't mean he doesn't like you or didn't really want your number. It means that he's a man and can only think of what's in front of him and your number is in his pocket while his job/the football game/his buddies/his dinner is right in front of him. If he doesn't give you a call in a week, then perhaps you should be focusing a bit more on your job/friends/life anyway. If you IM her and she can't talk, or is brief, or doesn't even answer...give her a break. Maybe she's tired, maybe she's talking to friends she's known and loved all of her life who definitely come before you at the moment, maybe she's looking up her dream home on the trading spaces website...whatever it is, let her enjoy it. DON'T force a woman into the idea of being ready at your beck and call so that when you don't call (or im as the case may be) she sits there waiting...and waiting...and...well, you get the idea. Let her have her fun, enjoy her down time, and don't flip out. If she ignores you EVERY time, perhaps you should send a quick email saying, hey, do you want me to stop talking to you? That's the nice guy thing to do.
In other words, really, just chill the frick out. Obsessing hurts you wayyyyy worse than it hurts them, b/c if you're obsessing, they probably don't care. Just let them be who they are, don't force it...throw in a couple of good hooks and then sit back, be mysterious, and let them catch on when they want. Don't be so damned impatient. Argh.
Okay rant of the day over.