Overheard on Muni

"Odd numbers are the devil. Even numbers rule the world."
"What about a number like 300? It's even, but the predominant digit is odd."

~teens on the 47, Saturday night

I used to really like Sheryl Crow

And I realize this is taken slightly out of context...

BUT SERIOUSLY!

The Washington Post gave us an Earth Day present:

Singer Sheryl Crow and environmentalist Laurie David have been traveling across America on a two-week Stop Global Warming College Tour, which winds up today at George Washington University. Crow and David (co-producer of the documentary "An Inconvenient Truth" and wife of "Curb Your Enthusiasm's" Larry David) have been touting their cause and chronicling their travels in a rather idiosyncratic blog. Here, on Earth Day, are a few excerpts:

You can read all the excerpts yourself, but this is the one that has me going:

Crow (4/19, Springfield, Tenn.): I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.

Oh yes, this will save the world.

Honestly, though, are Sheryl Crow's "pesky occasions" anything nearly as "pesky" as the rest of the world's? The woman doesn't eat. No wonder she doesn't need toilet paper.

Nibbles?

I promise to blog about Vegas, but first I have to mention the giant elephant seal that's attacking people and animals in Sonoma. I know it's probably pretty scary, but this cracks me up. I can't help but laugh when I see his picture. The best part is that the big ugly thing's name is "Nibbles".

I'm even more entertained now that I found this video of a different elephant seal.

My Invitation Must Have Been Lost in the Mail

The Global Philanthropy Forum is taking place at Google this week. I so want to be there!!! Just to meet some of the people mentioned in the San Jose Mercury News article. Even Judith Rodin, the CEO of Rockefeller Foundation, is jumping on the capitalist philanthropy model! I want in!

Some basics:

Philanthrocapitalism'

They invest in social causes as they would the stock market or a start-up, but the return is measured not only in financial viability but also what impact the initiative has in solving global problems. The new hybrid model has been dubbed "philanthrocapitalism" and its practitioners "philanthroprenuers."

The 1/1/1 model

Marc Benioff, founder of Salesforce.com and the Salesforce Foundation, created a model for corporate philanthropy known as the 1/1/1 model. His company donates 1 percent of its employees' time, 1 percent of its equity, and 1 percent of its product to philanthropic endeavors. Google has copied Benioff's 1 percent commitment formula.

Profit from benefit

Yet others see a new era dawning.

"Google exemplifies this emerging blur between for-profit and non-profit," said Peter Hero, an adviser to the Silicon Valley Community Foundation. "It gives them an ability to invest in a for-profit entity that doubles or triples the bottom line, provides a financial return but also a significant social and environmental return."

The guiding theme of the Global Philanthropy Forum meeting this week is to explore market-based solutions and encourage entrepreneurship. Instead of funding a medical clinic, that might mean investing in a biotech company for a new vaccine.

New Age Hoo Haa - Humorous or Creepy?

Working in bookstores for several years, I became way more acquainted with new age authors and theories than I would have ever thought possible. All of the talking to the dead and the conversations with God and the silver broomsticks were actually pretty entertaining most of the time. One of the most prolific authors in the New Age section was Carlos Castaneda. An article in Salon today discussed his legacy.

Castaneda appealed to all types of believers, including those who were too rational for new age. Whether or not you believed he actually met with a Shaman and saw through to the source of all things, much was still valuable regarding the way of life he preached. Much like any other belief system, it's easy to pick and choose great teachings from his works. (You may not belief Christ rose from the tomb, but it's difficult to argue with "treat your neighbor as you would like to be treated.) This pulled in a great number of people and Castaneda was dubbed the Godfather of New Age.

In addition to the appeal of the masses, Carlos drew in academics and intellectuals with what seemed to be a knack for narrative anthropology. Because he was simply engaging in the rituals of the Native Americans, it seemed more that he was studying a culture, and his books were taken as real anthropology. His books have generally been accepted as non-fiction throughout the years. In 1972, a great deal of skepticism led to the debunking of most of Castaneda's lies, and he disappeared from public in 1973. It's what happened after this point that drains the humor from the situation.

Castaneda began a movement known as Tensegrity, and had many devoted women followers known as witches that included past and current lovers. They lived in secrecy, separated from theif families, used numerous aliases, and didn't allow photographs. CULT So the creepy part starts with the discovery that many of Castaneda's followers disappeared the day after his death, and more several weeks after his death. At least one was found as a skeleton shortly afterward. Cleargreen, the corporation that promoted Tensegrity and Castaneda, still exists and claims the women are travelling. For the last 30 years.

Castaneda definitely has moved New Age from funny to Creepy as hell in my book. I've got the creepy shivers. Think I'll go look at some cuteness and shake it off.

Today

Is a sad sad day.

Kurt Vonnegut passed away early this morning.

If this doesn't make affect you, go pick up a copy of Slaughterhouse Five and read it right away.

At the very least, take a moment to learn why this incredible man was so important to literature and the world at large.

My favorite Vonnegut quote:

***God damn it, you’ve got to be kind.***

Surgery Costs

When I was told I'd need to have surgery, the first thing I did was attempt to get an estimate of the costs. The surgeon's office told me he charges $3,500, and gave me a rough estimate that the hospital (the same one they always use) varies greatly but shouldn't be more than about $5,000. I tried again and again and again and again to contact the financial counselors at CPMC to get an estimate, and was never able to talk to one of them. There's actually a bug in their phone system that sends you back through the same cycle over and over without ever getting you to a person or even to be placed on hold. I finally just started pushing zero to wait for someone that could connect me to the right person, but after 6 days of trying at least twice a day, never actually spoke to a human.

Today I called billing and chose the option "pay my bill". I was connected right away and informed that my total comes to $19,000. Read that again. And again. Now add that to the surgeon's costs. What I thought would be around $10,000 (and thus only a few hundred for me after insurance), is $23,000. Twenty-three thousand dollars.

Not for the surgery mind you...just for the room, the anesthetics, the equipment, and the nurses who helped me for 4 hours. Oh yeah, and the morphine. Lots and lots of morphine.

I can't imagine what it would have been if I'd stayed overnight.

This is insane. Insane.

Back at Work

First day back at work. It's actually not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I'm cabbing it so I'm not abused by the bumpy crowded busses, and I'm working from the nice comfy couch in the office, so all is okay. I am, however, at work in sweats and a t-shirt. Just waiting for my swollen tummy to go back to normal. Off to get a few more things accomplished before I head back home!

The Pain, The Pain

OMG I had no idea it would hurt so badly.

Pete had to work from home today because I can't do anything for myself just yet. Not fun not fun.

The worst part? I can only lay on my back and sit in certain positions. This leads to sleepless nights and sleeping limbs.

I can't imagine having to deal with a C-Section recovery and a screaming baby at the same time. To all you mothers out there, I'm tipping a big giant hat your way.

I'm Okay!!!

I had my surgery today. All went well. They gave me a video! I'll post it soon.

Thank you so much for all of your well wishes.

Ode to My Gall Bladder

I never knew thee
until you hurt me,
and now I'll soon be
without you.

Your stones of bile,
so wretched and vile,
have cramped my style,
it's true.

But soon a doc's knife,
with only some strife,
will take your small life
of no value.

I'll eat, drink, and play
like back in the day
when things went my way--
before you.


For those of you who don't know already, I'm having my gall bladder removed on Wednesday. I'll be out of commission for a while, and I would love good thoughts and prayers for no complications and a speedy recovery. Thank you!!!

Older and Wiser

As I was lamenting over being 26 today, my sweet boyfriend asked why the move from 25 to 26 was such a big deal. I told him that it made me feel old to know that I was no longer in the first quarter of my life.

He very kindly pointed out that the first quarter of my life actually ended the day I turned 25.

Woah. Now I feel loads better.

When the Comments are the Best Part

Mental Floss featured an article last week on pomegranates. Not only does it offer a couple of nifty little facts, such as the relationship between pomegranates and grenadine as well hand grenades, but it also offers religious symbolism. The best part, though, is comment #1:

"They now also have pomegranate tequila."

Best. Sentence. Ever.

And it's TRUE!

poo poo on not having the liver capability to rush out and try it right this second

More Kitties?

Well, maybe not more kitties, but there is a new kind of kitty.

You can read about the Bornean Clouded Leopard at Science Daily.

This is the best kind of news.

Why I Love the Doctor

I went to the doctor today for the second time in five weeks to find out what is causing my mysterious stomach ailment (also known as the evil ender of my drinking days). While I usually bemoan the scale in his office because of its overt attempts to bring down my self-esteem, today I wanted to kiss the damn thing. I weighed in at 12 pounds less than I did on the last visit. Taking into account the fact that I was wearing jeans then and a skirt today, we'll call that a 10 lb loss. Maybe the weight loss will motivate me to stick to the extremely limited alcohol consumption plan. At least for a while. :)

Evangelicals in SF?

Christian Teens Rally to Save SF

By the tens of thousands, Christian teens poured into proudly liberal San Francisco on Friday for a two-day evangelical extravaganza where they would rock, pray and provoke progressives, who accused the movement of working toward a theocracy endangering "San Francisco values."

Man, if my church had come out here to pray for progressives, I just might have been rescued from the hoards much sooner...maybe even would have made it out here earlier.

I wonder how many of these kids defect once they are exposed to this amazing city? Let's see some stats on that, Jerry Falwell.

I'm unique!

There are 299,968,595 people in the United States of America. If everyone in the U.S. lined up single file, the line would stretch around the Earth almost 7 times. That's a lot of people.
The U.S. Census Bureau statistics tell us that there are at least 88,799 different last names and 5,163 different first names in common use in the United States. Some names are more common than others.
There are 49,535 people named John Smith in the United States. There are 1,048 people named James Bond, 113 people named Harry Potter , 503 people named George Bush, and 31 people named Emily Dickinson. However, Johnny Cash (39 people) songs aside there are, statistically speaking, no boys named Sue.
What about you? How many people share your name? Enter it and find out how many of you there are.
The combination of German and Welsh makes mine a little more difficult to find. There are only 7 of me!

HowManyOfMe.com

There are: 7 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

So now I'm on a quest to find these 7 people who share my name:

1. ME
2. Austin, TX-- of a legendary inventor
3. Baltimore, MD--staff at Loyola College
4. Houston, TX?--owner of racing doberman (could be #2)
5. Seattle, WA--volunteer with a Community Center (could be #2)
6. MSU, Linfield College, OR--Scientist?
7. This one is a mystery!

I Love You, Bono!

Costly Red Campaign Reaps Meager $18 Million ~Ad Age

Gap's Red campaign isn't doing so (red) hot. $100 million in marketing costs only led to $18 million actually going to the Global Fund. The Ad Age article uses a sharply negative headline on what is otherwise a balanced presentation to show that some are concerned about the cost to benefit ratio.

As a nonprofit professional, I tend to agree with the guys at buylesscrap who think we should encourage direct giving rather than consumption. However, that "meager" $18 million is a whole heck of a lot more than the $13 million they received from the private sector last year. With a budget of around $1 billion, Global Fund receives 99% of its funds from governmental organizations. Any addition to that tiny 1% from corporations and everyday folk is good, right?

The guys at buylesscrap.org don't think so. They promote charitable giving rather than buying crap we don't need. Of course, they're right in so many ways. In theory, all people should give directly. In theory, communism is a great idea. But we've seen how that works in practice. The fact is that many of the people who bought red items would not have dropped $10 into a jar at the counter. Sadly, so many people need motivation to give that consumerism is the only way to draw them out.

So perhaps throwing Bono out there to motivate goodness isn't such a horrible thing. If someone is going to go buy a shirt anyway, they are more likely to pay extra for a charitable shirt than they are to forgo the shirt altogether and make a direct donation. Sad, but true. Yes, we should give up the junk we buy, but most people aren't ready for that. So let's take some baby steps and get a corporation to donate a portion of the products we buy for them. Not a horrible idea.

It could work, and I think it would have worked a lot better if the public really understood the problem. The marketing campaign has really focused on tying the project in with Bono and creating a buzz around the "everybody is doing it-even so and so celebrity" idea. It might have been nice if a portion of that $100 million marketing campaign actually demonstrated the good work of the Global Fund and the need for support. This might be one area where corporations could have used the nonprofit field to come in and show them how to pull those heart strings.

As for that cost to benefit ratio, the Ad Age article is doing a little propaganda of their own.

The $100 million was funded by Gap, Apple, Motorola, and others. This result in some amount of income for each of these companies, PLUS $18 million to the Global Fund. Ad Age is assuming some standard to compare this against, but this is a fairly new idea in the large corporate world and thus doesn't really have a standard to meet. Even if the income for the companies is lower than $100 million, that loss is on the part of the companies and could really be considered an in-kind donation to the Global Fund.

So give it a rest, naysayers. We can't really judge how well it's doing yet. This could be the start of a great movement. Paired with the absurdly large philanthropic gifts from major CEOs as of late, this could be the beginning of something bigger than we ever thought.

Maybe, just maybe, consumerism could save the world.

Crossing my fingers, but not holding my breath.

Overwhelmed by Sweetness

These little guys are best friends. I don't think I can handle the cuteness. Look at the way that orangutan is hugging that little fuzzy kitty.

Too bad in a couple of months the tigers will prefer the primate's meat to its love.

Read about this odd couple (and the other two animals involved) on CNN.

You think the orangutan will feel heartbroken when it's friend tries to eat him?

Are People Essentially Good?

Ervin Peretz thinks so. He got so hot and bothered during an argument over the concept, that he decided to try a little experiment to prove his point. That little experiment meant dropping six figures on start up costs for a new coffee shop in Kirkland, Washington called Terra Bite.

How does opening a coffee shop prove that people are inherently good? It doesn't. But not charging people anything and asking them to pay what they feel when they feel they should goes a long way toward providing the necessary evidence. So far, Ervin says, it seems that the people who pay more than enough or making up for those who don't.

You can read the article for yourself at AZ Central.