The perfect man

Saw this in an ad on craigslist, and thought I'd showcase it here. My own editorial comments are in bold or red. :)

My fantasy man
He would be tall. At least 6'1 (I can deal with shorter) He would work out and have really sexy arms. He would be extremely smart. Own his own home or at least rent a nice home. His car would be clean, and he would have a good stereo. He would have good taste in music, new music, not just the shit he used to listen to when he was in high school and make me mix cds. He would have a dog..(a big one-not a little yappy thing) I'll be able to love him without worrying that I'm being too clingy (and he'll be secure in that love). He'll be very affectionate and love to cuddle. He'll be strong and make me feel safe no matter where we are. He'll be passionate about his job, and if not, passionate about one of his hobbies (passionate about anything is okay...hopefully many things). He'll have lots of books for me to read (and have read at least some of them). He'll love camping and hiking and swimming. (But also love hanging out in the city) He'll smell good. He won't have numerous tattoos or piercings. And if he does have some, he won't think they make him hella cool. He'll be good to his mom and have a good relationship with his family. He'll want to get married and have kids one day. He'll make me laugh. We'll read the paper together over breakfast, and read books in the living room at night. He won't be on stupid weird diets, but he will be healthy. He will make me want to be successful and guide me in the direction I need to go in. He'll pay for everything, and in return, I'll always look great, notice things he needs and buy them for him, clean and cook and swallow. He'll appreciate the finer things in life and know that you get what you pay for, but he won't be superficial or think you can buy taste, or love. He'll enjoy taking care of me, and letting me take care of him. He'll be past the stage where impressing his friends is more important than treating his girlfriend well. He won't be intimidated by tall or assertive girls (i.e. me).

Okay, boys, there ya go.


Tim said...

Your perfect man seems kind of boring, and with a bit of an ironic mommy-complex. Not particularly human. No fun flaws. And—not that there’s anything wrong with that—but if he does exist, he’s gay. I figured you'd like the Woody Allen type, anyway. lol

Javier Moreno-Pollarolo said...

I'm colorblind, Monika, so I don't see which ones are your comments! :)

Anonymous said...

Before you can ask that of someone, you need to be able to provide that of yourself to him. Otherwise you're looking for someone to make up what you can't produce, instead of enjoying what you both are. IE Gold Digger lf sugar daddy. That's not love, its lust or self preservation. Considering you were just looking for money last month, seems like you might be a Pier 39 patroller. But, I work down there..come by, I got dollars!