Tried on this fabu black dress today. Couldn't believe it, but it hid all my newly acquired and unwanted curves. Was v. happy until turned around and noticed daring backless area that revealed...back fat! Argh. Once you have back fat, you're def. overweight. Okay, so it's not mounds or anything, but still. I always loved my back. Til now.

Marched over to sports section and bought dumbbells and fun workout videos. Spent the next few hours salsa-ing and mambo-ing my way to slimdom. Also lifted weights for first time in MONTHS. It was soooo nice. Started diet, too. Def. actually starting it this time. No more breakdowns for me.

Got a strange email today. Pet Peeve of the moment: people who think they can judge you when they don't know you. That goes along with people who give you advice when you don't ask for it. Nothing bad against the person who does it...just need to not do it. I mean, does anyone really know any other person well enough to make judgments about their inner thoughts? We all want that. I think. At least I do. I want that amazing man to come up and tell me he gets it all and he knows all the stuff that I haven'tshared and he sees me for who I really am...but who am I kidding? I'm expecting a man to do that? That's a bit unfair. Sucks that the guys I want to read me can't and the ones who don't know what they're talking about are the ones who attempt. Topsy turvey analytical bullshit. argh.

I'm off to sulk, and properly plan my line of attack on cute bn boy, for awhile.

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